Entertaining - the First Steps

I have to admit that the first time I was at an event was probably my own christening.  I was a couple of weeks old and I know from the pictures that the party was held at my grandparent's house.  The 1970's gold couches and the arched doorways give it away.  When I think about all I "have" to have to entertain, I remember all those times where my grandparents entertained.  Their house was basically a box with two bedrooms off to the side. The remainder of the house was split in two - the kitchen, always painted a light blue with delft dishes and little dutchman accents.  The front room with big windows led out onto the porch. 

There was never a lot of discussion about fancy dishes, glasses, placemats, flowers.  But we were always surounded by family - Aunts, Uncles, cousins, great-aunts and great uncles, grandparents, and even in my early years great grandparents. 

See in those days it wasn't about what we had who we had with us.  Today it's so different for our family.  The cousins are dispersed amongst the states.  Only my parents live nearby.  And because we waited to have children, we are in a funky state.  All our friends who are our age have colllege-aged children.  All our friends who have kids the age of ours are about 10 years younger and don't always share the same remembrances.  So my first challenge is the question of who??

I didn't just start this blog today (blushing)

Like a lot of things, I have gotten distracted . . . have you ever done that?  Get going for like three straight days and then never touch it again?  That was me.  But when a friend and I recently had a going away party for a friend, I got to thinking of my poor little lonely blog. 

Sadly, I had only two posts worth saving which were the premise of why I was blogging in the first place.  But despite all my good intentions, I have gone all the time since then without entertaining.  Perhaps you could call having my parents over for the holidays entertaining.  Perhaps you could call having my prayer group meeting at my house once in a while entertaining.  But that would be stretching it.

How do I get started? 

I have to admit, that my husband whom I love dearly, was raised in an "I am a rock, I am an island" environment.  I can't understand how, but I'm all about being connected to others.  One of my biggest fears is getting old and having no friends around to share my life with.  Unfortunately, I think it's possible that I may be on the wrong path.  This last year, I've been doing a lot of reading about how sharing a meal or an occasion bonds people.  So can I be bonded to people I haven't shared anything with?  Good question.

So who was the first one to come up with this entertaining idea?  Somehow, I can't picture early women in their caves or tents, setting up table decorations and placecards, can you?  Were they dusting to make sure everything was spotless?  Did they secretly sneak out to someone else's tent, peeking under the flap to make sure their tent was just as nice?  I doubt it.  I get the idea for the early generations of people it was more about sharing a hunt or a harvest together.  Or maybe about celebrating a birth or a marriage. 

So maybe that's what I need to work on.  A little more sharing - a little less fussing about the perfect house, the perfect dishes, the perfect flowers/placecards, etc.  Not that anything is wrong with those lovely things - but only if it adds to the celebration.  For me, for now - it's just stressful.  But that's another post for another day!

I was just wondering.  Do you think that all those people on HGTV really entertain as much as they say.  I mean, every time you watch a show they seem to talk about how much room to entertain.  Prospective home buyers are looking for a kitchen "great for entertaining" or a yard "great for a barbeque" or a great room "so I can visit with my guests".  Is it really true that you're all having guests over all the time?  I have to be honest, except for my parents (and we know that doesn't count), I can not remember the last time I "entertained".  Am I just lazy?  Am I anti-social?  Am I societally deficient?  Have I got some odd, yet-to-be-named phobia?  Am I missing a gene?  Am I traumatized from a childhood of entertaining misadventures? Or am I normal and all those HGTV'ers are faking?

Here's a blog to help me answer my questions - is it possible in a day of e-mail, facebook, twitter, iphones, skype etc., to have personal face to face time with people - and I'm going to accept the challenge of having people over and see whether I could actually find the lost art of entertaining!